Being a Kickass Lady Boss in a World Full of Badass Bitches

(Originally written for Her Campus)

Leave it to generation Y to take two negative curse words and turn them into a compliment. If someone came up to you and told you that you were a badass bitch, you might be pretty flattered. Unless, of course, you actually were a badass bitch and knew that this term has cracked up to mean a booty-shaking, slang-saying, cursing Barbie doll. Thank you hip-hop culture for corrupting what it really means to be a badass bitch. So, here’s your friendly reminder of what the term truly means – or maybe we should start putting a more positive spin on things and telling each other that we’re kickass lady bosses instead.

You, my fellow kickass lady boss, are fearless; you light up a room and intimidate close-minded people. Here’s what you do differently:

1. You live life consciously instead of subconsciously.

Your subconscious begins forming the moment you’re born. Your values and beliefs become ingrained in who you are without you ever really realizing it. But instead of just accepting everything you’re told, you choose to challenge it. You need to find truth in it for yourself. You take the bull by the horns and are going to create your own person instead of being a product of your environment.

2. You treat yourself with respect.

You know your value and your worth. You know that you’re good enough and that’s exactly how you plan on treating yourself. As women, we know that there’s always going to be someone out there who we think is better than we are, prettier, smarter... but that’s not going to stop you from knowing that you are smart, competent and worthy.

3. You risk rejection.

You are confident in yourself as a person and are willing to put yourself out there in uncomfortable situations. You’re not willing to just sit on the sidelines; you apply for jobs that you know you might not get, you introduce yourself to strangers and you take risks. You dive in headfirst, because you would rather be told no than not take the risk at all.

4. You’re okay with your relationship status.

In the world of online dating, being single has become a type of disease. Monogamy has become passé. A playboy lifestyle has turned into slut shaming. You just can’t win and quite frankly, you don’t care. Single, you’re happy focusing on yourself. Monogamous, you’re happy with your significant other. Your love life is no one’s business but your own.

5. You know when it’s time to walk away.

You have no interest in investing time and energy into something that has no return and you refuse to do just that.

6. You’re not an episode of the Bachelor.

You’re not an option for someone in any aspect of life. Either you’re their choice or they don’t get your rose. You’re not going to compete because you already know that you get the final rose.

7. You’re okay swimming against the current.

Everyone else doing something that you’re not into? Cool! You don’t care. You’re busy doing you, bettering yourself and becoming a boss lady. You know that Eleanor Roosevelt knew what she was talking about when she said that “well-behaved women rarely make history.” So in the wise words of Dory, just keep swimming.

8. You know how to put yourself first.

Until today, culture has told us that we have to be a wallflower and step aside for the men in our lives to do great things. We have to raise our children the right way and be the kitchen servant of the house. But you know for a fact that you can’t help others be great unless you become great first. So right now, you’re focused on yourself and you have absolutely no shame. And you’re no one’s kitchen servant but your own.

9. You refuse to put your life on hold to compromise.

You’re not going to allow someone else’s ideal dictate the direction you take. Only you get to navigate and only you get to drive until you choose otherwise. So windows down, music up and hit the gas.